Bottom:Before Bottom
by FancyFilthyWeeb16
Summary: Eddie was a hard alcoholic skinhead trying to move on from the past of losing his friend that all changed when he met a twat called Richie when he moved to Hammersmith...
1. Chapter 1

It was the early 1980s in the city of London

Thatcher was reigning supreme and many people were losing jobs so some of those people would start up skinhead gangs against thatcher

One of these gangs involving a young auburn haired Adrian Stuart Houston and blonde Eddie Hitler

So what do you think of my Graffiti asked Adrian in his strong Austrian accent

What Graffiti? Eddie asked as he downed a beer bottle he held in his hand

Mien graffiti on this wall see it says Target Margaret Adrian said trying to convince Eddie that it would get their message out while he pointed to the wall that had Target Margaret sprayed on in sloppy blue spray paint

Well do you know what I think Eddie said laughing under his breath

What Adrian asked in anticipation at what Eddie's opinion was

I think that… the colour is too saturated, the message and alliteration sounds too nice to be threatening and overall it looks like total bollocks

Oh Adrian said quietly pouting

You need to think of a threat along the lines of the only birds I like are the ones that aren't in charge of parliament Eddie said trying to think of a idea

But we are supposed to stop thatcher not seduce her complained Adrian

Is that what we were doing? Eddie said hiccupping from the beer he drank earlier

Yes because we have no jobs and we don't want to be on benefits anymore said Adrian slapping himself

Oh well if I could have a job I'd be that Joan Major's husband said Eddie thinking perverted thoughts

You mean John Major? that's a bloke right you aren't a bloody queer Adrian explained sounding annoyed

Oh um of course not I like birds as much as the next bloke Eddie answered back coughing in between sentences

But Eddie you know me I don't get any birds and neither do you we are working class men who are history enthusiasts who are also perverted almost all the birds nowadays are feminists so they wouldn't want a bloke in their life Adrian shouted

Then maybe I should be a bird then it can't be that difficult and what is this feminist thing the last time I heard that was when a bird at the pub socked me in the face Eddie babbled

Adrian had enough with the Dipsomaniac known as Eddie Hitler he felt like having a fight with him when he felt a mental disconnection as he started to forget his surroundings and delve into despair

Eddie asked What's wrong matey?

I don't feel well Eddie I'm aching everywhere what are we doing? Adrian mumbled feeling dejected

We were in the middle of a protest but the others got arrested so we were just taking care of the leftovers Eddie answered

Who cares about the leftovers or even the stupid protest it's like I'm not going get any jobs who's even going to care if we die anyway

I care I need a job it's hard to find a job when your last name is Hitler and if you'd die I'd miss you I'd have nobody to have pub fights with and even in the afterlife I'd look up on earth and laugh at you like I usually do

It was too late Adrian had already walked off like he couldn't even hear what Eddie had said to him.


	2. Chapter 2

Eddie tried to continue with his skinhead work as weeks past but it wasn't quite the same when it got the big news

"Institutionalized"? how can Adrian be institutionalized he's one of my best mates well he is my best mate why are you doing this to him? Eddie shouted

"It's for his own good he has a severe case of depression which requires treatment" he would be in too much of a dissociative melancholic state at the moment" said one of the doctors

"My mate Adrian can't be a loony he just can't be Oh God" screamed Eddie feeling nervous at the thought him not being able to see Adrian again

"Hallo Eddie I'm Professor Richie you'll be able to see Adrian again once he's in a more stable condition just know that he's in safe hands another doctor explained

"just Bugger off the lot of you Adios Adrian our facism murals won't be as beautiful anymore" snapped Eddie as he started crying as he left the front desk walking round to the local pub to drink his sorrows away

Not so long after that it was the peak of the 1990s a new decade full of good telly, thatcher no longer being in office and a ton of political scandals

By this time Eddie was still on the dole but by then he had moved on and even moved his location to Hammersmith

He found a flat that was said to belong to a duchess who worked with the conservative party

But when he opened the door he didn't see a duchess he just saw one of the biggest tossers he had ever saw in his life who didn't look that different from his old mate Adrian but with the same blonde hair he used to have now that he was balding.

"Hello there" said the blonde haired man happily as he opened the door of the flat

Who the hell are you? Asked Eddie confused

I'm Richard Richard I was in the Falklands you know I looked after the horses

Falkland Flipland I thought a grand duchess with big jugs lived here?

Oh a grand duchess that's my auntie mabel she sold the place and now I live here

So your saying I came all this way to find out the place is owned by a pretty boy twat and the children's show icon from come outside? Exclaimed Eddie

Of course not and who are you calling pretty boy I just turned 30 year old a couple days ago

Then on second thought you aren't a pretty boy you're just a fat git

Ok listen I think we might've gone off on the wrong foot here I don't even know your name yet

If your wondering my name is Edward Elizabeth Hitler or Eddie Hitler for short

Hiding his chuckling Richie responded with Well I'll be happy to call you Eddie and I don't care if you have a odd last name like that

Then I'll call you Richie and thanks for the name compliment I got the name from my mother

Your mother? Well historically Hitler did get his surename from his mum? Are you of said bloodline?

No Matey I'm plain good old English and my mom was a wrestler for your information

Then explains your big figure

I BEG YOUR PARDON

Oh sorry Eddie I should watch my sarcasm next time I'm English too just how I like it my auntie worked with the conservatives

You've already told me that you privileged prick

So um have you got a woman for yourself yet

No I date birds but none of them really stick around

Same really except I've gotten no birds at all I'm 30 years old, I'm cut off from my rich background and I'm a virgin

I'm bored already shakesphere sounds more entertaining than your rambles

Now don't you insult the great playwright young man he inspired a new generation of theatre

Yeah theatre that is completely crap I'm going to watch some telly

And I'll start cooking tonight's supper

While the Emmerdale ending then played a loud beeping sound could be heard

WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS THAT? Eddie screamed as he noticed some flames rising from the kitchen

Hahaha sorry about supper ahhhhhhhhh another loud scream could be heard from Richie as the flames started blocking his way

Eddie felt drowsy all of a sudden not just because his excessive drinking but because he felt a memory triggering of when his old mate Adrian had his breakdown and it felt like death because of how numb he was feeling restrained he then hit his head with that booze bottle realising the situation he went to the fire extinguisher and put out the fire covering half of Richie in foam in the process.

I apologise Rich I just felt dazed for a second there what are we having for supper?

I know I'll call the chip shop from down the road I'm sure they'll be open

Hello, yes is this Victoria's chips? Splendid this is Richard Richard speaking No I did not make moves in my previous call anyways I'd like to order two fish suppers please with curry sauce,your best chips and whatever drink of your choice, thank you bye

After ordering Richie and Eddie had a delicious meal even if the curry made Richie sick to his stomach which eddie laughed at realizing that as full of himself this new bloke was he wasn't that bad and maybe he could create new memories with him that he would've made with Adrian.


End file.
